From 15 years to 1… I’d been with my previous partner for close to 15 years. This article isn’t really about that relationship. I just mention it to illustrate how out of touch I am when it comes to new relationships. I expected my current partner to just “know” that I hate mushrooms, am a [read more]
Resolve to be Less “Nice” & Set Better Boundaries for the New Year
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January is the month for setting goals and intentions for the new year. It can also be about learning to set new boundaries. Some people think of boundaries as negative things, ways of keeping people out of something…but really, boundaries are for protecting yourself, they’re there to keep you and yours safe and sacred, even [read more]
“Pass the Carbs, Please.”
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Oh, the Holidays. They can mean so many different things to so many different people. It can be about the warmth and comfort of being with family. It can be about making your own traditions with your own unconventional, modern family. It can be about just getting through it with a carefully planned, tactical playbook, [read more]
Crafting Chosen Family Traditions Can Help Dispel Holiday Blues
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A client once told me a story about how she learned to deal with her holiday-related loneliness and depression. Once upon a time, this client (let’s call her Sara) fell in love with a man…and a woman. She married the man, and kept the girlfriend (with her husband’s consent and approval). At one point, they [read more]
Your Secret Remedy Against Heartbreak
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We hear so many stories about women breaking other womens’ hearts. For instance: Jill broke up with Nadine just weeks before their wedding, with no explanation. Felicity let Keisa support her through years in prison, then dumped her for someone else when she got out. Laurie asked Evan to put their relationship “on hold” while [read more]
9 Sweet Ways to Show You Love Her
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Getting stuck in the day to day rut of life can rob you of the joy that a deeply connected, loving relationship can bring you. No matter what is going on in your life, you have something special – love. Each and every day you can choose whether you’re going to strengthen that love or let [read more]
Turning Over A New Leaf
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“What was I thinking?” One of the things I really need to get better about is my impulsive nature. I have a tendency to jump right in without thinking things through. This applies to anything, really. For instance, last year, my wife and I were casually chatting over breakfast about kittens and she said “What [read more]
What’s really important…
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Last weekend I got a scare. Luckily it wasn’t a bad one but it did make me “adjust my perspective” about what is really important in my life. I was home watching our littlest and watering the house plants when my partner called me. We usually text each other and she’d already texted saying she [read more]
The Importance of Touch & Containment in a Relationship
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PDA: A Heterosexual Privilege I remember when I first came out as bisexual twenty something years ago, I became acutely aware of the heterosexual privilege I’d taken for granted up until then. Suddenly, I didn’t feel comfortable displaying affection for my girlfriend in public. It made me feel somewhat estranged from her, because we had [read more]
Love or Lust? Compatible or Not? Here’s How to Know
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So much of the relationship misery and heartbreak we see comes from a few dating and relationship mistakes that are completely AVOIDABLE. Yet most of us make them over and over – I know I did! – simply because we haven’t been educated in how to choose a compatible partner. In 1982, I got together [read more]
