PDA: A Heterosexual Privilege I remember when I first came out as bisexual twenty something years ago, I became acutely aware of the heterosexual privilege I’d taken for granted up until then. Suddenly, I didn’t feel comfortable displaying affection for my girlfriend in public. It made me feel somewhat estranged from her, because we had [read more]
7 Cornerstones of Emotional Safety in Gay Relationships
By
We experience the presence or lack of emotional safety in physical, emotional and mental ways. Both feeling safe and not feeling safe can be intense, and powerful because they are felt in so many different dimensions at once. When you don’t feel safe with someone, it’s important to assess the severity of the situation, the [read more]
Dealing with Stress: Do You Turn Toward, Away From, or Against Each Other?
By
Turning Toward, Away, or Against When stress occurs in your life or relationship, do you and your partner turn toward each other for support, soothing, and assistance? Do you try to protect your partner (or yourself) by keeping things to yourself and turning away from your partner? Or do you turn on each other and [read more]
Fight Fair Without Fighting At All!
By
“And then you said I was worthless in 1974 and that made me feel like you didn’t love me, which you’re now proving once again!” Oy, the joys of a fight gone out of control! We’ve all been there. Experienced those moments where we feel like we’re in perpetual fight, spinning down into the depths [read more]
If Your LGBT Relationship Sucks, Then Quit Working So Hard At It!
By
Maybe it’s because I turned 50+ this month and I just don’t have the patience any longer for whiners. Or it could be that I know, once the pain becomes less to get out of a crappy relationship then to stay in one, then the complaining will stop. It’s neither here nor there. When you [read more]
The Healthy Purpose of Jealousy
By
The Potential for Jealousy is Doubled for Bisexuals Bisexuality is often invisible because the problems bisexual people face are often identical to those faced by everyone, regardless of sexual orientation. Bisexuals are, before anything else, people and they each have their own quirks and things that make them unique from other people and other bisexuals. [read more]
Finding Miracles in Relationships
By
When miracles in relationships happen they aren’t always what we expect. Roberto Rossellini’s Voyage to Italy recently aired on TCM. Made in 1954, it stars George Sanders and Rossellini’s wife, Ingrid Bergman. The story takes a slice out of the life of a wealthy English couple traveling in Naples, Italy to take possession of a [read more]
5 Ways to Create Emotional Safety for Your Partner
By
Whether you’re having a conversation with a friend or spending time with a date or life partner, how you interact with him can help him feel safe. Or not. You have a big impact in creating the conditions where it feels safe for him to let down his normal reserve – his armor – and [read more]
5 Ways To End Procrastination In Your Relationship
By
It’s been said, “Procrastination is like masturbation. You’re only screwing yourself.” Now that I have your attention, let’s move on and get to the heart of why procrastination is killing your relationship and how to fix it. Like it or not, and just my rough guess, I’d say that 95% of relationships are at risk, [read more]
The Power of Journaling
By
Seven years ago I went through a powerfully painful, life-shattering breakup. (We’ve all been there, right?) Over the following four years I rebuilt myself using a variety of tools and methods, which included excellent food choices, daily yoga and meditation, nourishing friendships, supportive coaching and counseling, regular juice fasting and detox practices, travel and… journaling. My journaling [read more]
